Friday, April 10, 2009


There was only ever one type of longing that I've felt. It is the longing for freedom.

Freedom to travel. Freedom to live as I please. Freedom to make mistakes and learn.

This is something that I need. It is not a want anymore, rather a need.

My heart aches when people around me are free to explore and discover the world on their own. I've always wanted that.

I've always wanted to go to Europe - To go backpacking through the continent to non-commercial cities.

To Ladakh- To go backpacking in Ladakh.

To England - To spend a summer in a cottage in the English countryside.

To Rome - To make a silly wish, laugh and then toss a coin into the Trevi Fountain.

To Africa - To volunteer to help the poor and diseased. To do social service.

To Goa - To street shop and meet eccentric people. To taste the fusion of cultures and write about it.

To Japan - To capture images of falling cherry blossoms. To learn to make a perfect sushi.

To Bangalore - To go to sleep happy and wake up happy, without chaperones this time. To bask in the weather.

To Tuscany- To inhale the scents in the air and exhale in awe. To not speak the language and befriend locals.

To Maldives - To relive good times. To detoxify. To relax. To just be.

To Greece - To take photographs.

To Makkah - To repent for all my sins. To seek redemption.

To Singapore - To eat everything I grew up eating. To feel like I did when I was a child, again.

To Madras - To live like its home. To not see anyone that I don't wish to see. To reconstruct a pre-existing life.

Thursday, April 9, 2009

Its the People!

I can't remember the last time that I was ever excited about anything as excited as I am to go back to Madras for the summer.

Dubai has been great.. fashion central (!), the high life, more out of tune with reality even. I guess I figured out why I'm burning to go back to Madras. I don't think any amount of sensationalism, luxury or blissful blithe could replace the sentiment of comfort that I feel when in Madras.

I figured, its the people. It has always been the people! I never could comprehend why I couldn't shake off the feeling that Dubai is inadequate somehow despite the fact that I have little to complain about. The hassles are minimal and anything I desire to see or do is within arms reach. The city boasts the world's tallest building, the world's biggest mall, the Burj Al Arab (no definition needed there!), the country has wealth beyond comprehension and the people.. Rich. Just generally rich.

The city of Dubai itself has an impressive array of restaurants, bars, shisha cafe's, malls, cinemas and almost any form of recreation that you might be in the mood for at any given time.
But it comes back to the people.

In my three years here, I managed to meet a total of 300-something people (courtesy to social networking sites for giving me a round number). 300 individuals. 300 individuals with different lives, different interests, different passions and relationships. Looking back now, meeting 1 girl would have sufficed. She's the same as all the other girls that I've met anyway. The same goes for the boys. You meet one boy, you've met 'em all!

300 is a large number. But out of this lot of people, I can use my fingers to count the number of people who have been nothing but a pleasure to talk to. In fact I might as well do it now.


There's 4 people (!?).

Getting to Madras. Thinking of it now, I'm too much in awe to even compare with Dubai. Who might have guessed that the I would miss the loud-mouthed auto-driver, the over-friendly neighbors with dogs that never cease to stop barking, the ever gregarious hawkers and vendors that hustle you for 5 extra rupees for your Bajji at the beach.

The culture might have its limitations, but its comfortable. And the people.. Ahh, the people! The wonderful people of madras. Just those words have such an elevating ring to it. It sounds fresh. It sounds like there are rooms full of remarkable people just waiting to be befriended.

It is when you live somewhere where the priorities all seem topsy-turvy that your top priorities are most evident to you. It is when you live somewhere that advocates all the unnecessary amendments that you realize its level of pettiness. It is when you live somewhere that does not stimulate your thinking that you will not mind living in monotony elsewhere.

20 days till nirvana! x

Friday, January 2, 2009

Happy New Years!

2009 it is!
Regardless of how I spent New years, I am feeling pretty good about this year. I read my last year's journal entry and I've fulfilled everything that I wrote I wanted to do.. and be. As always, I have no expectations so in this moment- I am content.

Although there is one little needing grazing against my skin every once awhile, I dont want to talk about it now though. Anyway, I am content because I got good grades this semester, my mother and I aren't fighting, I am at home right now, I can't think of anything to regret aaand I lost some weight. So that's that. I'm just a happy little ray of Indian sunshine! :p

Oh yeah.. Happy 2009! =) xx